35 years in education and more than 18 years as a Head have taught me that everyone thinks they can do the job better than you can (and in my case, they probably could)!
Being a Head places you at the centre of a complex web of relationships.
You are personally invested in each one, and each person will have a personal investment of sorts in their relationship with you. Working in the independent sector in particular means that you have that sort of relationship with your clients (the parents paying the fees), your bosses (the governing body) and the colleagues you lead (teaching and support staff) as well -unusually- as with your ‘product’: the young people you are educating.
And everyone has an opinion about whether you’re any good at your job…or not. Everyone!
Everyone, by dint of the fact that all have a knowledge and experience of being in school themselves for a considerable portion of their lives, has an idea of what they expect from you, and what they need you to be for them. Many will think that they understand education in general, or leadership more widely, or your school in particular well enough to believe -perhaps to be certain- that they could do the job better. I know…I’ve been there myself in younger days and with my own kids early schooling.
As a ‘people pleaser’ by nature, I have found that this is not without its challenges. It has, I admit, sometimes led to some poor decision making, especially when those decisions needed to have been tougher or more unpopular. But I hope also that it has meant that most responses to most situations have taken into account their potential impact on as many of those they might effect as possible.
I have learned the hard way that as a Head, if you can please some of the people much of the time, you’re doing OK. Most of the people most of the time is the best you can hope for, but few or none of the people all of the time seems more like reality. I guess it’s the sort of experience shared by others in roles such as vicars, footballers and political leaders: everyone always thinks they know -or could do- better that you!
In the end, of course, it’s not about pleasing people at all: it’s about ensuring that the work you are doing and the reasons you are doing it promote the long-term flourishing of the institution you lead and all those who comprise it. Holding on to that -and articulating it appropriately- has been really important at times in recent years.
On my headship induction course in 2005, a wise and experienced Head offered us a fairly uncompromising vision of the paradoxes at the heart of the job we were embarking on. I have never forgotten it, and eventually managed to track a copy down from her after many years of trying. It sums up very well indeed the impossibility of pleasing everyone.
The Headteacher’s Minefield
(or You Can Never Get It Right)
If you’re late for work, you set a bad example;
If you’re early, you’re trying to impress or you’re unhappy at home.
If you stay late at work, you think you’re indispensable;
If you leave on time, you’ve no interest in the job.
If you consult your staff, you’re afraid to make decisions;
If you don’t, you’re autocratic.
If you take someone into your confidence, you’re creating a clique;
If you don’t, you’re aloof.
If you are kind, you’re just trying to be popular;
If you are not, you don’t care and think you’re above it all.
If you let others take responsibility, you’re passing the buck;
If you don’t, you’re high handed.
If you are old, you’re past it;
If you are young, you’re an upstart.
If things go well, you’ve been lucky;
If things go wrong, it’s all your fault.
But when you are dead?
You were a great Head!